The Brains way of Healing.

Dr. Norman Doidge

I've been reading a book called "The Brain's Way of Healing" for honestly the past year. It took me so long to read it not because it wasn't interesting, but because I liked to read it slowly and dissect and ponder each section. (Also who has time to read with little kids??) I was  already confidently recommending this book to everyone I knew after only 10 pages into it. It is one of the most thought provoking books I've ever read, so I wanted to do a little blog post about it to remember all the highlights that impacted me the most. 

"The brains way of healing" is a book that explores the science behind a malleable brain. It had been believed for many years (and is still believed by most practitioners) that damage to the brain is irreparable. This would mean that those with injuries relating to the brain (trauma, mental illness, debilitation etc.) are confined to whatever their circumstance may be and are better off to accept it and work with it than try to improve it. Even our methods of treating injuries all of the body demonstrate how much the brain is misunderstood. Dr. Doidge, the author, depicts a beautiful picture of the inter-workings of the brain and we see that everything in our body is processed through this complex organ. Damage to the eyes, ears, throat or any number of areas in the body can be improved through the utilization of the brain. The science and evidence provided in this book shows just how limiting many of our beliefs and practices have been, and that if we were able to open our minds and hearts to other possibilities beyond many of the current practices today just how much it could impact the lives of many that are hurting or struggling; including our own. 

Medicine has become such a controversial subject, and that's sad. We are frequently told by others we encounter in our lives that we are either doing it the right way, or we have been doing it the wrong way. I feel like we live in a day where people are so extreme and there is no middle ground any more. Our religion, our politics, our exercise, the way we eat, and definitely the way we practice medicine has become so defined by firm beliefs we have developed and no one is actively or openly listening to anyone else anymore. I really struggle with this current state of our society, and in my own life try to retain as much balance as possible. I really love that this book embraces doing methods that just make sense and have worked, and yet it is so hard for people to accept anything contrary to the current common practices. I'm hoping that with the current climate in our society that instead of being resigned to certain opinions based on where we think we should stand, step back and think about what really MAKES SENSE and how you REALLY FEEL about it. 

I work in a hospital, and so I have some perspective on the things that go on there. I feel like we have gotten to where we are because there have been so many changes in the private sector of the medical field over the past 50 or so years, and a big one is that there is A LOT of money to be made in that industry. It's not the employees that are drastically over paid, it's not the nurse who tenderly looks after all you needs, or even the doctor who can spend long sleepless nights at the hospital trying to figure out what is wrong with a patient. No, it's the people that you don't see. It's the big wigs in the pharmaceuticals or the companies that manufacture gowns for the exam rooms for 50 cents a piece and turn around and charge the doctor's office 100 bucks for it, which cost is then passed to you. There are a lot of things at play that have brought this about, and in my opinion it is a lot of corruption that is making some people a lot of money at the expense of the majority of Americans. My parents had a baby without insurance 37 years ago and were able to just save and pay for it in cash. You could never do that now, you would need to take out a big loan or it would bankrupt you (by the way these are all my opinions, not things in the book.) All the hospital fees along with insurance prices sky rocketing over this period of time (and it is due to more causes than Obamacare whether you want to believe it or not,) it is getting so hard to sift through all the mess and just figure out what is the best medical treatment for yourself or your child.

So what is my point? My point is this. When the most money to be made is through (for example) a surgery, there is a lot of pressure from all directions to get the surgery, whether or not that is considered to be the least invasive or give the most effective outcome. It might be that surgery IS the best option, but with so many things at play it's hard to know if we are really getting the most informed solution to our problem. We have come to a point in our society where we are always judging others and we always feel judged. We are defensive and skeptical of one another at the same time, and we seem to make decisions based more on our emotions than anything else. My wish for myself after reading this book is to be open minded to the ideas and inspirations of others and to be constantly making small changes in my day to day to improve the quality of my life and the lives of others.

Ok, enough already right? What does the book actually say? Well, because there are so many detailed methods and explanations within the text I really just recommend that you read it, but since this is a postscript mostly for myself and the things I want to remember I will give some of the highlights. One of the ways to initiate healing is through the senses. Utilizing sounds, touch, and movement. The Tomatis method is a sound therapy in which children and adults listen to music or the spoken word at different frequencies. It sounds so simple, but this has helped improve speech, spacial awareness, mood, sensory, and sleep among other things. The Feldenkrais method demonstrates how taking broken bodies and touching them, moving them in natural motions with healthy bodies can change their own movement. Going on walks, physically moving the body as we think or listen to music can improve our cognitive and motor functions. Healing can also take place by harnessing elements we find in nature in harmony with our bodies, light and vibrations have been used in laser therapy by Fred Kahn for over 20 years. We see in hospitals how the use of light can help reduce bilirubin build up babies. These same techniques are applicable when light is directed at the brain or different parts of the body to stimulate systems within the body. A device called PoNS was developed by Helius medical technologies. This device uses electrical stimulation on "channels" in the tongue to stimulate damaged or malfunctioning areas of the brain. It has dramatically improved individuals with a range of different types of brain traumas. All these different methods have improved the lives of so many without any side effects because they are all non invasive "natural" treatments. These treatments are not 100% guaranteed to work on everyone, but what is the harm in trying it if there are no negative side effects? When I listen to commercials these days for medications and they list all the possible side effects I think, this sounds WORSE than what they already have!

I have thought a lot about this book and the experiences of the unique individuals who have changed their lives through these methods. One thing I wonder is why it worked for some people and not for others. It doesn't follow up much on those who were not improved because obviously those are not great examples, but I am sure they exist none the less. One of my theories of why it worked better for some rather than others is a topic that I am very interested in, it is the idea of the human spirit. That is why GATTACA is one of favorite movies of all time, because I love the idea that our will to do something gives way to limitless possibilities, nothing in our lives is set or predetermined. We choose our own destiny, and we can achieve what it is we set out to do. I listened to a podcast not long ago that talked about athletes and how they tried to determine what made one athlete run further or faster than another. They looked at all kinds of factors such as muscle mass, glycogen usage, oxygen levels, and many biological processes. What they found was that when it came down to the best athletes in the world they could't find one thing that predetermined one to have that extra advantage over the other. It was their will to win, the human spirit. In the book it talks about a man named John Pepper from South Africa. You read about his incredible life story, and his eventual prognosis of Parkinson's disease. John uses a number of different things to improve his motor functions but the main thing he does is walk a certain amount every day. John  has tried to teach many others his methods but few seem to have the relief of symptoms to the extent that John has had, or the desire to use the same method that has worked for him. My belief is that John is so successful because of his strong will, desire, and self control. John uses his will to circumvent the damaged parts of his brain that would stop him from having complete control of his limbs. It takes a lot of work and concentration because he has to actually think through every single motion of his body that are usually on autopilot in the brain, but he does it. John says in the book that he is confused why more people don't try his method. I think it is because it is really hard. The author Norman Doidge M.D. discusses pain in the brain. All pain in your body is experienced through and because of the brain. This is a safety mechanism that helps us from further hurting ourselves, but it can be a problem when it turns into chronic pain. Every single thing you do is the result of neurons firing in your brain. This is how we do normal habits like reading and walking, but it is also how we form habits, whether they be good or bad. Each time the neurons fire the connection grows stronger so that the process of playing a song or doing a puzzle gets easier every time. The negative side effect to this process is that bad habits form in the same way and just as easily. Each time we look at our phone or have negative thoughts about ourselves or others, these connections continue to grow stronger and the urge to do them increases. Similarly, when we experience pain repeatedly in one area we can start to develop what is called chronic pain, which is pain we feel whether our bodies need the warning or not. This is caused from our neurons firing so often that a connection is made and the neurons don't stop firing. To solve this problem we have to override our brains neural activity and create new stronger neural connections. This is easier said than done, but that is the where the idea of human spirit and the human will comes into play. We have to be strong enough individuals to take control of our thoughts and our bodies and direct them where we want them to go. I used to have a lot of things that would give me anxiety or trigger panic attacks, but I realized I didn't want those to control my life so whenever I had a thought of anxiety I chose to override it with other thoughts. I did this until one day I realized that these things no longer gave me anxiety. That is why sky diving was such a beautiful experience for me. Heading up in the plane I was so overcome with fear, I felt literally paralyzed to the point that I couldn't breathe and I honestly felt my bodily functions were shutting down. In that moment I realized that I could take control and that fear wasn't what I wanted for myself. I wanted to enjoy this unique experience. So I closed my eyes, I took deep breaths and I directed my thoughts else where. I can honestly say that when I stepped out on the ledge of that plane there was not one ounce of fear in my heart or mind. It was beautiful. 

Many of the health issues discussed in the book are not ailments that currently plague our family, but I loved all the science and theories in the book and so after I finished it I wanted to figure out how I could incorporate them to improve my own life. I am big believer in achieving a big change by making small incremental changes over time. There are people out there who are able to just go cold turkey and quit smoking over night, or cut out all unhealthy foods from their diet in a day, or a number of other dramatic life changes, but these people are very rare and often have a hard time sustaining these changes long term. That is why I have chosen a few small things to start changing in my life which will hopefully lead to eventual sustained habits and permanently rewiring the brain. One is to switch out the type of music I play in the car to something that may stimulate and relax our brains. Another one is take control of any negative thoughts about myself or others and try to direct them to a more positive route. I also see that there are a lot of things that I am doing right, and I am committing to myself to continue doing these things. Active walking with my kids, being outside, doing yoga multiple times a week, and choosing more often than not to eat heathy foods. I have already seen how these things have improved my life and I want to continue to improve to become the best version of myself. 

Lastly I wanted to discuss a "negative" review of the book because I think questioning things is always good. I was curious to read reviews of the book on amazon. Majority were rave reviews, and some were even people telling their own stories of having found some of these methods on their own and the success it brought them in their own lives, but there were some that had some criticism for the book. One of them I touched on earlier was that these methods are presented as miracle workers when in fact they may not have worked for every person. This is a very interesting criticism to me because all medicine is this way. We go to the doctor for treatments, and there is always a chance they may not work, and often they don't, but we accept that. For whatever reason we take offense to "alternative" methods that don't work (and by alternative I mean methods that are not mainstream.) I think this perception comes from seeing other who may have tried natural methods that didn't work and we feel these people have been misled and had they tried a different method things would have been better for them. We don't know if this is true on not, but the reality is that medical procedures don't ALWAYS work either. Another reason is that I think we often feel that these other methods are not backed by science and if they were than we would be using them. "If these methods are really so great, why are we not using them." said one critic. I laughed a little to myself when I thought about this, because of course, it sounds so logical! But look at our world and the things people do that just don't make sense! I feel, as I mentioned earlier, that money is a factor, but I digress. We feel like if someone is offering a more "natural" method to us it should work for everyone and if it doesn't it is bogus. In fact many people came to find these methods after using others that were recommended that simply didn't work. Also why would we say no to trying something that has no negative side effects. If it doesn't work, try something else! I knew someone who's child was on a medication that was considered very risky and could have very severe side effects. I suggested another remedy that my sister had used that worked very well for her, had no side effects, and was a fraction of the cost but she was so averted to the idea of using anything natural that she refused to try it. Both sides of the coin tend to view the others approach with distain and we have to find somewhere to meet in the middle. I truly believe that we can.

In conclusion I loved this book because it reminded me of all the things I don't know what I don't know, and to always reach for more knowledge and be open to what others around me have to offer. I was assured that all the little things that I do in life, reading and singing with my children, spending time with them, taking walks and playing, these things matter. The book also helped me learn things that I could be doing better to help the growth and development of myself and my children. My hope is to seek to improve my own life and the lives of others, in that I  pray that I can find the greatest happiness. 

Olive and Elijah update.

It's been awhile since a did an update with my kids and they are growing up so fast and changing everyday so I better stop time for one second and record all the little wonderful things I get to witness everyday. 

Here is my little Olive as she is right now. Each day she says a new little phrase that makes me laugh and wonder, "where did you hear that?" Although most the time I can hear myself parroting back. As you can see she still loves dinosaurs. We went to a little Provo birthday celebration and Olive got her face painted with this little dinosaur and got to have a something made from a balloon. When she reached the front of the line the man asked Olive "now what would you like, a pretty princess crown?" Olive exclaimed "No! I want a dinosaur!" She got what she wanted. Each day her relations with our brother get better, but she still has a hard time when he touches or grabs certain things of hers. We are working on it. I have always had little things that I have said to tease her like "I'm going to kiss your face off!" and recently she doesn't like them so much and will say to me "Don't say that again or I will put you in time out." haha I am trying to stop, but I really do want to kiss her face off! She doesn't get put in time out very often, so when she does it is VERY dramatic and seared in her memory. Yesterday she asked for the first time if she could play with a friend that day. I guess she is growing up. I love it and hate it at the same time. I can't imagine not having this spirit in my home anymore, but I can't wait to see her grow and spread her wings and find all the things that bring her joy in her life. For a while she has been doing this thing where she has to stack all her books in big piles by her bed. I tried to put them back on the bookshelf once. That did not go well. She picks two or three books before bed and absolutely insists on turning each page, and it doesn't really matter how short the book is these days because Olive will dissect every little thing on the page and so it takes an hour to read one book no matter what. Sometimes it's ok, sometimes I am on the verge of "freaking out" as Olive (and I) put it. She loves it when I play dinosaurs with her and color in her coloring books with her. I love hearing her play with her toys and the conversations they have with one another. Lots of times they are falling off things and getting saved. She is great at make pretend and is constantly turning certain things into "mud" that we have to get out of to not get stuck. We are always being chased by sharks or T-rex all the sudden and then we have to find refuge. She always finds something interesting in inanimate objects, like in the winter we stepped outside and saw a big patch of snow and she said "hey mom, that's a t-rex!" And it really did look like one! She will also take little bites of her food and proclaim them to be boats or the moon, or whatever she decides the food looks likes. She has recently been learning to ride her bike and loves to ride with me around the neighborhood or to the park. She is always racing with everything she does and proclaims that she has beat me no matter what. If I beat her things don't go over well. She loves to go to her Grandma's or a friends house, but she would still always rather be with me if I will play and spend time with her. She gets easily distracted and will sometimes start to talk to me and her brain will wander and she will say "Mom was I going to say?" As her mom I can always answer that question. "You were asking for milk Olive." "Oh yes mom, can I have milk?" Sometimes it gets hard when she can't remember things because she isn't paying attention and I can get really frustrated, but I try to be patient. Sometimes I think I am doing a great job, sometimes I think I am failing miserably. When I feel that way I remember that I love this little girl more than anything and that if I keep giving her that love everything will work itself out in the end. Maybe I'm wrong, but that's what I tell myself. I feel so lucky to have this little girl in my life, so I'm trying my best to guide, nurture, and help her see her self worth. 

I love you Olive. 

Oh my little Elijah, each day I fall more and more in love with you. These pictures show your little rascally personality and I just love it. It's interesting to raise one child and that's all you know and then when you have another you say oh, that's you, you are so different. You always wonder how much of it is nature or nurture. For example this little guy is more of a bully than Olive. If he sees a little kid he will sometimes walk up and push them or get mad if he sees they are playing with a toy that he wants or going down the slide he wants to go down and he will yell and hit. Olive was the opposite, always giving toys to other kids and confused when a kid took something, but our world revolved around her and she got whatever she wanted and so she didn't really need to be possessive and really didn't even know what it meant to have something be "hers." Everything was hers. Don't worry, she is more than making up for that possessiveness now that she has a little brother. And poor Elijah always has to be fighting to get or keep a toy and so I think that fight is getting more engrained in him at a young age. He is a lot pickier than Olive was (and is) and I think that is a result of both nature and nurture because with Olive we could control everything that went into her mouth for so long, but with Elijah he sees what Olive is eating and he wants that and so he was exposed to sweeter flavors at an earlier age. We still try really hard with him, and sometimes he will give in if he has no other option or if I shove it in his mouth so he can see it's not that bad after all, but sometimes he just spits it right back out at me. I still tell myself it's worth it for the few times he keeps it in and gets exposed to flavors and eats something healthy. If he sees anything else he wants in the near vicinity he will refuse to eat whatever it is you are trying to give him. I got him to eat a soup the other day with carrot, beans, zucchini, avocado, and corn but the next day when I tried to give it to him and he saw his dad eating a bagel, game over. *sigh* We will keep working on it. Smoothies have been an essential way of getting him to have some greens. He is late talking just like Olive was and still doesn't really say anything except for Mamma and some animal noises. He is pretty good at doing signs, but I always forget to keep doing them after I teach him and so then we kind of lose them. If I remind him he will sign more, all done, bath, dad, book, shoes, outside, car, elephant and ball. He is working on some others but some of the signs are so hard for little hands. Sometimes I can tell he is doing a sign because his hands are moving in a purposeful motion, but I can't figure out the sign. It took me a while to figure out his sign for Dad, but he was doing it every time he saw KC so we finally figured out that is what he was signing. It's hard for babies to do signs on their face where they can't see their hands. Olive had a hard time with that too, and still does. I have to keep reminding myself to do them since it is such a good way of communicating with him. He is very attached to his Mom right now and will often turn his head in disgust at the idea of someone else taking him. He went through a really fussy stage a bit back and I noticed his teeth were cutting through and I had hoped that was what was causing it so I didn't have to have this fussy baby for always, luckily that was the problem and he is much happier baby these days. He loves balls and I have learned to bring one with me everywhere or else he will try to steal others kids, and sometimes he still tries to steal other kids. He is a really good dribbler, he was playing in our driveway and I watched him follow the ball so well and keep with it. I thought wow, he is better than Olive! He continues to do that at the park when we go to play. He is also begging me to take him down the slide 50 million times. We do a lot of "family slides" with all three of us. He is starting to get to that stage where he gets attached to things and I got him this panda bear at Ikea and he asks to have it in his bed with him, along with other various toys and sometimes a book. I love the little smile he gets on his face when I hand it to him, and he pulls it in close to face and snuggles it. He loves to read and point to things and have me say them over and over again or sign the word. I know all the books he loves and he especially loves the Dinosaur Roar book. He is starting to do some animal noises, his favorite is to moo like a cow. I take Olive and Elijah lots of places and I am always having to chase Elijah around, once his feet touch the ground he is off in all directions. Poor Olive has to stop and wait while I run after him, we try to make it work the best we can. He fell and scraped his face bad on the pavement a few weeks ago and it has finally healed but he may have a little scar on his forehead, and few days ago he burned his hands really bad on a door panel that had heated up in the sun. He screamed for hours and it was so sad and hard and had me in tears trying to relieve the pain. He is getting better now. He went through a big stage of throwing things in garbage and we think he may have thrown away KC's wallet and passport. He isn't doing it as much anymore but I still catch him occasionally throwing toys away. Little rascal. He loves to play with dinosaurs like his big sister and is always dragging them around and making them "roar." He also loves to go through all of Olive's books, much to her chagrin. I am looking forward to the day when I can read them bedtime stories together, for now that is just not possible. He loves to play outside in the backyard in a little red car a neighbor gave us, and he is always trying to escape every time the front door opens and make a break down the sidewalk. Elijah and Olive seem to run everywhere they go in the house and I love the pitter patter of their little feet running up and down the hallway. I love any one on one time I get to spend with each them. Each day we seem to get closer to a stage where they can happily play together, hopefully. Little Elijah you are the perfect addition to our family. You add so much spunk and personality and I just love you to pieces. I love your hugs and the way you put your arms around my neck and cling to me. That will never ever get old. I know this attachment stage doesn't last long, and while sometimes it's hard, I wouldn't change it for anything. I love these little babies running into my arms for safety, security, and love. I love you Elijah.

January-March

(Picture Overload.)

Over the holidays we had all been so sick and we just needed to get out of the house. 

Curiosity Museum was just the break we needed.

Documenting rare moments where they get along for 2 seconds.

Rock Canyon, before Elijah discovered he could throw rocks off the cliff and I could actually get him to walk somewhere.

Teamwork for these two. Building a dinosaur.

Bean Museum.

This was soaking our entire bathroom but I couldn't bring myself to stop it.

Copilots.

Play Bill. 

One of the best shows I have ever seen. A marionette show of sound of music from the most renowned puppeteers.

My heart.

Alice in Wonderland ballet. 

We took cute little Amelia along with us.

Olive "skis" 2016.

Grandma and Grandpa.

Best Friends.

Tour of the Lehi Natural History Museum.

Special Treats after our library visit. 

We will try all the new bakeries, thanks Mom.

A "we were here" picture after touring the provo temple.

Decorating cookies and making valentines. 

Olive would get such a high when I pulled out the sprinkles, her cookies were more sprinkles than cookie. 

Olive has THE BEST sunbeams teacher. 

Look at this adorable tea party!!! 

Olive loved it.

Neon lights imitating our feelings.

Then I made KC does this while the dog watched and Olive cheered us on from the couch in the back round.

Girlfriend Ski at Sundance. 

This girl can ski, she doesn't mess around.

Callie's princess birthday party. 

It only took an hour to get that thing to open.

Our Yearly Ski Day.

 We had some good chats on the ski lift.

Boys and their toys. 

We call this the "secret path" up at rock canyon.

Happiness is here.

I have to entertain this guy while Olive is in Preschool time at the library. 

He ditches story time right after they quit singing, sometimes I can get him to come back for the puppet show. If I'm lucky.

Olive took a tumbling class. It was so cute.

Crazies at the Zoo.

Frozen on ice with cousins.

Chasing these two everywhere we go.

Paddle board yoga in the Crater.

Providing and serving food at this shelter in honor of Bryant.

It was a great experience.

Throwing rocks and sticks.

It's hard for me to stop Olive from doing things that I secretly want to do myself.

Teaching this little how to climb.

Elijah was having a hard time this week and was crying and fussing all the time. He had some teeth cutting through. Those types of days feel like they will never end. I remember snapping this picture and thinking this may be the only time he had smiled that whole week! It only lasted a second. Those scratches on his face are from a face plant running at the park.

This photo embodies childhood to me. 

I was teaching Olive how to ride her bike.

Dance party for a friend's birthday.

This day was full of GREEN GREEN GREEN. It was pretty fun.

Hiked the Y for the first time in I don't know how long! Elijah was good on the way up, but screamed the entire way down.... so that was fun haha. It actually really was fun though.

Easter Egg Hunt for these littles. 

I let Olive color some eggs with markers and she loved that.

She dyed some with her grandma so I decided to skip the mess, which is a little unlike me :) 

Easter snuck up on us this year in March and I didn't like it! I need more time to enjoy all the cute little eggs scattered around my house. I may or may not still have my knitted eggs up on my piano, I just can't take them down! They are so cute!

In these moments I love her the most.

This kid can dribble a ball better than his older sister! 

I am starting to bring a ball with me everywhere I go, he loves them so.

On Bryant's birthday we went down to Utah Lake and let off some lanterns. It was beautiful and a really cool experience. Elijah immediately started to run straight for the water and would have just kept going right on in had I not caught him last minute. 

I love this last picture of Bryant's friend Jesse letting off a lantern filled with notes and love. There was such emotion and intention. 

Bryant you are missed.

I snapped this picture of Elijah at the Zoo to document the one single moment he stopped moving the whole day! I spent most my time chasing him around, the little bugger.

I took Olive along on a Mutual Activity ice skating. She was so unsure when she first got on the ice and I thought she was going to quit after only a few minutes, but I was slowly able to get her more and more comfortable until she was running around by herself with the help of this walker and even venturing out on the ice without it a few times. 

My sister and I realized we had never tried the "duck face." 

We still don't get why people do it haha. 

This was the most fun day, my sister is so funny and adventurous she keeps you laughing every second you are with her.

More drone chasing.

All parties involved enjoy this immensely.